Mom asking about preggo daughter

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Would you do this? Looking for inpartial input.
http://www.etsy.com/forums_thread.php?thread_id=5669289

Anyone Who Read My Pregnancy Thread
http://www.etsy.com/forums_thread.php?thread_id=5669710

15 comments

Anonymous said...

I have no respect for mothers who put 13 year old daughters on birth control and allow them to have sex with 18 year olds when they turn 15.

WTF did she think would happen?

WTF is wrong with parents in this country?

June 17, 2008 at 7:03:00 PM EDT
Anonymous said...

parenting license should be revoked now

June 17, 2008 at 7:17:00 PM EDT
eclipse said...

I just hope the daughter or her friends never read Etsy. I think I would never forgive my mother is she broadcast my personal business and sex life on a public chatboard where anyone can see.

June 18, 2008 at 6:27:00 AM EDT
Lisa said...

"WTF is wrong with parents in this country?"
--------------------------

I am actually the mom in question. I would be appreciative if everyone would read this please.

Those who are judging, I ask, do you have kids? Teens will have sex whether you "allow it" or not.

As a parent is it more responsible to ignore this and cause more teen pregnancy or to at least try to help them be responsible about it?

We go to Planned Parenthood regularly and I see loads of young girls with their moms there getting b/c so I know I am not the only one.

June 18, 2008 at 2:13:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...
This comment has been removed by the author. June 18, 2008 at 2:15:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...

parenting license should be revoked now
_______________________

I am sorry you feel that way. Despite your opinion I am actually (or at least have always tried to be) a responsible careful (and if you ask my daughter, overprotective) mother.

As I said to someone else, kids will have sex no matter what. I have no moral issues against premarital sex so I found it wiser to give her information she can actually use to protect herself instead of just saying "Abstinance."

June 18, 2008 at 2:18:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...

eclipse, actually my daughter knew I was posting it. She's not upset.

It's odd because the reason I posted it there is actually because I was trying to be private.

No one knows us on etsy, no one knows her on etsy. The only people who would know my real name or location are people who bought from me and none of my buyers posted on those threads.

I asked there because I was looking for some unbiased opinions from people who do not know us.

I think she would be far more embarrassed if I talked about it to people who do know us.

(Oh my above post that shows deleted, it was this one, but I deleted it to fix a typo)

June 18, 2008 at 2:26:00 PM EDT
Anonymous said...

"Everyone else is doing it" is the oldest, DUMBEST, most asinine excuse in the book. I expect that from children, not from someone calling herself a mother.

"Those who are judging, I ask, do you have kids?"

Yes. That's why I know you are screwing up.

"Teens will have sex whether you "allow it" or not."

COP OUT. Not true but they are certainly much more likely to have sex if they know mommy approves and supports them having sex. With an adult, no less. Do you supply her with booze and recreational drugs too? Why not? Everybody else is doing it, right?

I read your other threads under your various names. I understand that your daughter grew up watching you act out sexually with someone other than her father. Combine that with lax parenting and she didn't really stand a chance. I still have no respect for you and I feel sad for your daughter because she is going to have a difficult life and it could have been so different had you only stepped up to the plate.

June 18, 2008 at 3:04:00 PM EDT
Anonymous said...

your life is your business
yet,
by posting your *underage* daughter's sex life on a public forum you've really opened yourself up to this which maybe secretly you wanted.how could any reasonable person think this is okay for a business site that has a community aspect? there is no way you could think this is okay. you want a smackdown b/c you know it isnt right, deep down inside. or, just turn in the license and no questions asked.

do you want your mother to talk about how often you do it online?

June 18, 2008 at 4:04:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...

anonymous, I was not using an excuse of "everyone's doing it". I just meant that I am not by far the only mother who has willingly put her daughter on birth control.

Actually most other people feel I am being responsible, the thread yesterday was the first time I had been told otherwise.

As for drugs an alcohol as you mentioned, you are comparing apples and oranges. I have NEVER drank or taken drugs in my life and I have made sure my daughter knows how I feel about that. She too has no interest in that.

Then this part really has me confused "I understand that your daughter grew up watching you act out sexually with someone other than her father"

What the hell? I have never said anything like that. Are you sure you are thinking of the right person. I have all my shops linked in my profiles. Are you sure you are not thinking of a different poster? I've never said anything like that.

June 18, 2008 at 4:32:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...

esme darling, you are more than entitled to your opinion, but I guess I am just confused why this is causing so much trouble.

I have seen many well known etsy members post very personal details of their life and never been treated to the tar and feathering that I am getting.

As I posted in my threads yesterday, I chose etsy (in the etc) section to ask this because I knew I could get varied opinions there.

This has caused us both a great deal of stress the past couple months and before I acted, I wanted to make sure I was not just acting out on emotion and that I was thinking clearly.

June 18, 2008 at 4:35:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...

anonymous, the more I read your post, I just am amazed at how you are reading things into this

" Combine that with lax parenting and she didn't really stand a chance. I still have no respect for you and I feel sad for your daughter because she is going to have a difficult life and it could have been so different had you only stepped up to the plate"

Lax parenting? If this whole post wasn't so upsetting it would be almost funny. I am not saying I am perfect by any means, but I know of no one who actually knows us that does not think I'm overprotective.

She is 15 and she is not even allowed to leave the backyard without telling me. I am anything but lax.

We obviously disagree on teen sexually, but please do not think that I am lax. I just know of too many teens who became pregnant who had parents that refused to discuss sex and birth control. I felt/ still feel that I was being responsible as her mother by educating her to the risks of sex and to be responsible and pro active with birth control.

June 18, 2008 at 4:42:00 PM EDT
Anonymous said...

"She is 15 and she is not even allowed to leave the backyard without telling me."

That's great. I can hear it now. "Mom, can I leave the backyard? I finished my homework and I want to go have sex with an 18 year old man! I'll be back by dinner time!"

If you HAD educated her about the risks of sex, she would not have gotten pregnant.

June 18, 2008 at 7:34:00 PM EDT
Lisa said...

anonymous, you seem to be looking for ways to fault me that aren't really there.

I am guessing by this that you posted "If you HAD educated her about the risks of sex, she would not have gotten pregnant" that you did not actually read my threads.

SHE made sure the boy wore a condom. HE did not put it on correctly, it slipped off.

She is very aware of the risks of sex, but I do thank you for your concern

June 18, 2008 at 7:52:00 PM EDT
Closed Threads said...

Ok, we're done here.

(Gawd this makes me feel like an Etsy Admin!)

June 18, 2008 at 8:26:00 PM EDT